I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately as I’ve just accepted my offer letter from my job and am hitting new milestones with this blog.

It feels like yesterday when my supervisor hired me and here I am 4 months later, preparing to take a flight for my first work trip next week. I’m still not fully adjusted in my role, but I’m getting the hang of it – slowly but surely.

I remember so clearly …freaking out, scared they were going to fire me after a week when they found out I didn’t know what I was doing. I would call my parents after work and go to sleep stressed thinking about the next morning. And one of my greatest battles was fighting the urge not to call in sick…..I desperately needed a day off. And to be honest, after 5 months and not missing one day so far, I still do. But not just yet. Because when I do take my day off, I want to do it right.

Here’s a funny story.

I came the closest to “calling in sick” yesterday. Monday morning.
I completed my contracted 90-day period where I wasn’t allowed to miss any days. I woke up exhausted and just wanting a day for myself. Although my company verbally offered me the job last week, I was still waiting for my formal, written offer letter. I woke up at 6am thinking, “Okay, today’s the day I’ll finally have a rest day for myself. I do deserve it. Everyone has missed days since I’ve been here except me..” But of course, another thought crept in: but what if today could be the day I receive my offer letter?

And guess what, it was.

I begrudgingly dragged myself out of bed to work. Monday morning meeting – our boss notices someone who’s not here out loud, “Where’s [name]?” People shrug their shoulders and you know the boss isn’t pleased. Later that day I follow up with my supervisor if she heard any word back about my offer letter. She goes directly to the boss and comes back with good news. The boss signs and send me the offer letter right away, adjusting/matching the number I wanted for compensation.

What if I didn’t come to work today? ….was all I was thinking. And then after that, “I’m so glad I showed up today” It was a reminder that a lot can happen in a day.

Of course, please take your breaks and rests. But do them wisely. And remember that showing up for your future self is SO worth it.

Your cozypal,

ES